4 common misconceptions the West has about Pakistan

Before the world changing, constantly used as a ‘get out of jail free’ card, date of September 11, the average Westerner didn’t even know what Pakistan was. “Isn’t that the place with all the taxi drivers?” Was the response the name would generally elicit. But ever since then, Pakistan has been at the forefront of the war on terror and we’ve, like, totally been BFFs with these countries ever since. You’d think they’d know a bit more about us wouldn’t they? Well they do, but most of it is just completely off the mark. Here we take you through some of the most common misconceptions the west has about us.

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# 4 – Pakistan is a Middle Eastern Country

Firstly, pull out a fucking map.

Pictured: a fucking map.

Now, you see this close up of the Middle East? Yeah, we’re not there. Where are we? Oh only more than two  thousand kilometres east. In a place known to its closest confidantes as South Asia, perhaps you’ve heard of it? But you probably haven’t seen as how it’s location is a closely guarded secret and only those who pass the gravest rites of initiation may ever be privy too.

It’s probably because the world (unfortunately) associates Muslims and Islam with Arab and the Middle East. Though Indonesia and Pakistan are probably the most densely populated Muslim countries and neither one is Arab. Next they’ll be asking us if we ride around on camels!

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# 3 – We ride around on camels

The Middle East again?!? We are not Arabs! I’ve lived here my entire life and I’ve never seen even a single camel I admit we’ve come up with some pretty zany means to get from A to B, some even serve as life changing near death experiences for some…

See how many people we got on there? Now how many survive…

…but camels? You could have said cows or horses, but no, it had to be camels. In fact according to a fact I so totally didn’t make up because I lack the initiative to do actual research, Pakistan is the single largest market for Toyota Corollas.

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# 2 – As a country we are little more than a terrorist training camp

Granted, there have been a number of Pakistani’s who have been picked up on terrorism related charges both in and out of the country, but that doesn’t mean we’re all bearded bombers. Point in fact not a single hijacker who ploughed into the twin towers was Paki. In 2009, over 90% of the populace was not in favour of Al-Qaeda and the Taliban. With over 70% worried about the existing extremism in the country. And whether you love em or hate em, fact is the Taliban were a legitimate government and are, as a matter of fact, freedom fighters as attested to by the fact that the UN is preparing to grant them said status.

Would they have legos made out of them otherwise?

So you see? We’re not all bad. We just suck at image projection, we’re like Britney Spears’ ex PR manager who couldn’t help but promote the poor girl in a harsh light. It’s not her fault the world only got to see the ugliness was it? Poor girl just needed some sympathy and TLC, and we here at BigPen have a brilliant young writer who… (Editor: he continues rambling and making a case for why Britney should be given unto his custody, none of which I assure you we haven’t heard before.)

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# 1 – We oppress women

Now that’s just hurtful. When have we ever disrespected women? When have we ever oppressed them? Huh?

 ….oh, then…

In the immortal words of Chris Rock, ‘I don’t support spousal abuse, but I can understand!’ Sure there are instances when women have gotten the short end of the stick (nyuk nyuk) but isn’t that true for anywhere in the world?

It’s not as if the evil genius’ that rule this Middle Eastern country with their tyrannical Arab fist wake up and nod approvingly when they see ‘Oppress Women’ on the top of their to-do list. Our women have had the rights to divorce and vote since our inception, which is more than can be said for many other countries (you know who you are). Plus, we had the first female head of state in the entire Muslim (not Arab) world, and probably far before most other developed countries. ‘Probably’ because I don’t have the patience to actually base my claims on research. So let’s just take my word for it. Also, we have a ton of female fighter pilots… how many I can’t say without having to google… which I’m too lazy too.

It’s deplorable, but these things happen everywhere, we just get stereotyped for it. But what is conveniently left out of reported stories are the ones where women are leading normal, empowered lives in a manner that most western women can only dream about. Because lets be real, empowerment isn’t just about the freedom to take your clothes off wherever and whenever you want, although if ever there was ever a worthy cause to lend your support to, it’s that one right there.

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Categories: The World I Know

Author:Ali Raza

"Is this the kind of person you want protecting the galaxy?"

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9 Comments on “4 common misconceptions the West has about Pakistan”

  1. March 27, 2013 at 6:45 am #

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  2. Bilal
    September 9, 2011 at 3:18 pm #

    The sad fact is that… we do oppress women.

  3. September 1, 2011 at 10:56 am #

    Do really assume this is true?

  4. Kashan
    August 18, 2011 at 1:14 pm #

    nyuk nyuk…oye, i suggest you google the facts before you end up making pakistan the ultimate model of a state. but yeah i guess its gotta be the biggest market for corollas…haha

  5. Sidra
    August 9, 2011 at 1:18 pm #

    Hmm, my first time here, and it can hardly be called a ‘humour’ site. More like non-serious journalism in a high-school newspaper. Most of the articles didn’t even make me crack a smile.

  6. Alliya
    August 7, 2011 at 4:38 am #

    😀 100% spot on

  7. Najaf
    August 5, 2011 at 12:20 pm #

    the West is mostly controlled by their own evironment and media..they actually do not have that much info of what is in the rest of the world:) nice one:)

  8. rumi
    August 5, 2011 at 11:03 am #

    i meant nothing will..heh

  9. rumi
    August 5, 2011 at 11:03 am #

    if that doesn’t set them right, nothing well 😀 good one…

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